When I first returned to listening to Christian music a few years ago this was one of the first I bought on iTunes. I think I can safely say this was my theme song from the trip. It was a weird sort of trip. It's hard to describe. I'm not who I was last year. I'm definitely not who I was on the first trip.
The first year God smoothed the road before us. With small exceptions, the entire trip went off without a hitch. Last year it was hard from the get go, which we almost never got to. The first year I think I needed to have God show me He actually did care. I've spent most of my life thinking God hated me. It's a long story but it has a lot to do with how I ended up at my grandparents' four states away from my parents. The second year I think I needed God to show me that I was a lot stronger than I thought. It had been a hellish year up to that point and it only got worse before this past January when things finally started to get better. Maybe I needed to see that I could get through it.
This year, maybe I just needed to have an excuse to offer God all the praise right here and to anyone I spoke with about the trip. I wasn't raised to do that. In church, until this past year, I was often met with strange looks when I would mention God outside any sort of doctrinal discussion. Seriously, you should have seen the looks I got when I praised God after my first trip...even from someone who really, really, really should have known better. But I will refrain from naming names in a public sphere.
One day I will write more on the transition from religion to relationship, but it will get too long for the purposes of this blog entry.
Another thing that happened was kind of funny...OK, we laugh at this sort of thing at our house. We were in the hotel in Texas. I can't remember if it was Sunday or Monday, but the kids were watching Flywheel...again. (Hey, did you know you can watch the whole thing on YouTube in one video? I'll link to it at the bottom.)
***spoiler*** As the main character is returning the money to each individual former customer he is met by enthusiasm and thanks by everyone. He calls his wife and tells her how great it's been and how much easier it is than he thought it'd be. She tells him not to be prideful. The first 25 times I watched it...have I mentioned we watch that movie a lot?...I really couldn't see how he was being prideful. I thought he was being thankful, or just passing along good news.***end spoiler***
But as I listened to the scene play out in the background it suddenly hit me...I sound like that. All this spiritual stuff is coming so much easier than I thought. In fact, I was probably beginning to think it was going to be easier than it is. I was being prideful without even being aware of it. It gave me a lot to think about.
***spoiler*** As the main character is returning the money to each individual former customer he is met by enthusiasm and thanks by everyone. He calls his wife and tells her how great it's been and how much easier it is than he thought it'd be. She tells him not to be prideful. The first 25 times I watched it...have I mentioned we watch that movie a lot?...I really couldn't see how he was being prideful. I thought he was being thankful, or just passing along good news.***end spoiler***
But as I listened to the scene play out in the background it suddenly hit me...I sound like that. All this spiritual stuff is coming so much easier than I thought. In fact, I was probably beginning to think it was going to be easier than it is. I was being prideful without even being aware of it. It gave me a lot to think about.
Anyway, here's the movie my kids, especially Babycakes with his car obsession, think needs to be watched on a fairly regular basis. :)
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